Spotted on the Internet or submitted anonymously
(so not confirmed by anyone I know)
- Read the Bible....It will scare the Hell out of you! (I like this one!!! I have always thought that a good bumper sticker would be "Go to church or go to hell." Actually, I hate bumper sticker theology and wouldn't really put something like that on my car--but I think it would be more affective than "Got Jesus? bumper stickers.)
- A dam holds water back. It's not my last name. (God)
- Be Fishers of Men. You catch'em....He'll clean 'em!
- Christ is our steering wheel, not our spare tire. (does that mean we steer God?)
- "C'mon over and bring the kids." (God)
- Don't wait for six strong men to take you to church!
- Eternity: Smoking or Non-Smoking??
- Faith can move mountains, but don't be surprised if God hands you a shovel!
- Free trip to Heaven...Details inside!
- 1 Cross + 3 Nails = 4 Given
- "You think it's hot here?" (God)
- You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please disregard this notice. (What in the world does this mean?)
- Worry is the darkroom in which " negatives " are developed.
- WARNING: Exposure to the Son may prevent burning.
- That ‘Love thy neighbor’ thing, I meant it”! (God)
- Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!
- Prayer will give you a CALM - PLEX
- "Loved the wedding, invite me to the marriage". (God)
- "Let's meet at my house Sunday, before the game." (God)
- "Keep using my name in vain and I'll make the rush hour longer". (God)
- If God is your co-pilot.... swap seats!
- "I saw that." (God)
The following were found by Thomas on the Internet (not confirmed by eye-witnesses)
Thomas' comments on all this: "Why do Christians have to be retarded?" (I wish I knew the answer.)
- "Preach the gospel at all times. Use words if necessary."
- "In case of rapture building for sale."
- "Prevent truth decay. Brush up on your bible."
- "It's hard to stumble when you're down on your knees."
- "The wages of sin is death. Repent before payday."
- "Never give the devil a ride. He will always want to drive."
- "May is God's apology for February." (This church needs some help.)
- "God only answers kneemail" (Close to the all time winner.)
- "Try Jesus. If you don't like Him, the devil will always take you back."
- "The best vitamin for a Christian is B1." (Can you say corny?)
- "Tithe if you love Jesus! Anyone can honk!"
- "Under same management for over 2000 years."
- "Beat the Christmas rush, come to church this Sunday!"
Here are some I found on the net:
- "Seven days without prayer makes one weak."
- "No Jesus -- no peace
Know Jesus -- know peace!" - "Worry is interest paid on trouble before it is due."
- "The happiest people are those who are too busy to notice."
- "A man's character is like a fence. It cannot be strengthened by whitewash."
- "The best ability is dependability."
- "Soul food served here."
- "You can give without loving but you cannot love without giving."
- "Don't wait for the hearse to take you to church."
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